Dario Argento–Horror Maestro

Dario Argento is criminally underrated as a horror movie director. Deep Red, Suspiria, and Tenebre are all classics of the genre, and Bird with the Crystal Plumage is classic giallo, a type of mystery-horror-thriller popular in Italy in the sixties and seventies. Despite his impressive oeuvre, none of his films ever seem to get a wide release in the US.  Because of this massive neglect, I don’t think he’s even working on a film at the current time.

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An interview with Bryan Cassiday on zombie books

Interview with Bryan Cassiday, author of Zombie Apocalypse: The Chad Halverson Series.
The five-book boxed set contains the complete and unabridged editions of Zombie Maelstrom, Zombie Necropolis, Sanctuary in Steel, Kill Ratio, and Poxland.

 

I: When did you first start writing zombie books?
BC: In 2011. The first zombie book I wrote was Zombie Maelstrom. Publisher’s Weekly did a hatchet job on it when it first came out, but that did not deter me. I wrote four more zombie books.

 

I: Do you plan on writing more zombie fiction?
BC: I have recently written zombie short stories. I haven’t written another zombie novel in a while.

 

I: Are you going to write another one?
BC: I haven’t made up my mind on that. I hadn’t planned on doing another one, but I might change my mind. It would depend on whether there was any demand for one.

 

I:  What do you want to accomplish as a writer?                                                                         BC:  I want to take you out of your comfort zone.  You know that commercial where the advertiser wants you to be comfortable in your own skin?  Well, I don’t want you to be comfortable in your own skin.  I want you to squirm.

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Will you step back from my car? I’m going to start my engine.

I enjoyed the movie American Made.  It’s the fascinating story of the scapegrace pilot Barry Seal who not only worked for the CIA when they were taking on the Sandinistas in Nicaragua but for Pablo Escobar and the Medellin cocaine cartel. Tom Cruise has a blast playing Seal, who becomes involved in all sorts of political skullduggery as he makes himself rich plying his aviation skills to work for anybody that will meet his price, whether they be crooks or politicians.

Best line: “Will you step back from my car? I’m going to start my engine.”

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Don’t Forget Your Screwdriver in the Zombie Apocalypse

When you get your bug-out bag ready for the zombie apocalypse, don’t forget to pack a screwdriver with your condoms. Not only is it a handy tool for tightening screws and, to some extent, used as a pry bar, it can double as a weapon that dispatches zombies as well. The soft fleshy bottom of the jaw is a perfect entrance point for any edged blade, such as a screwdriver. The pliant flesh yields readily and allows the blade to penetrate both the roof of the mouth and then the brain to slay the zombie.

 

Be sure to take the slot-head screwdriver and not the Phillips, since the slot head has a chiseled tip. Though, in a crunch, you could still jam that Phillips into a zombie brain. The slot head can also be used as a pry bar, whereas the Phillips is inferior in this context.

 

Light and a cinch to pack, condoms, which are essential for your bug-out bag, can be filled with water and used as canteens. You can also forego rubber bands and use condoms in their place as weapons. You could fashion a slingshot out of a wishbone-shaped tree branch and a condom by stretching the condom between the two ends of the branch. Then all you have to do is gather some stones for ammunition and you can nail that zombie smack between the eyes with your slingshot, or, even better, shoot the creature in the eye, which is easier to penetrate than the skull.

 

The zombie won’t die unless its brain is smashed. You’ve got to destroy its brain. A slingshot’s stone might be deflected by the skull, but not by an eye. The only bone the stone might encounter behind the eyes is the ethmoid bone that is eggshell fragile, located behind and between the eyes, and can be penetrated with ease. As a matter of fact, prefrontal lobotomies used to be performed in this manner back in the 1950s, with an ice pick penetrating the ethmoid bone and entering the brain to execute its surgery.

 

A condom can also be used to conceal your handgun from human marauders who will inevitably run amok during the zombie apocalypse. Insert your gun into the condom, knot the condom at the end, then insert the package into a car’s filled gas tank. Marauders will never think to look there, and, when they’re preoccupied looting your campsite you can retrieve your gun and blow them away. It is an ugly truth, which must be prepared for, that during an apocalypse armed bands of marauders will roam the wasteland preying on fellow men.


And, last but not least, a condom is a necessity if you don’t want to contract a venereal disease or don’t want to overpopulate a world that is overrun with zombies and is in the process of dying–or if you meet up with a female zombie that you feel attracted . . . No. Just say no.
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Zombie Apocalypse: The Chad Halverson Series now has its own page

Bryan Cassiday’s shocking zombie boxed set Zombie Apocalypse:  The Chad Halverson Series now has its own Web page.  The novel is fiction, the horror is real.  Fast and furious zombie action.  Check it out.

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Force of Impact only 99 cents on 9/22/17

What better way to celebrate Fall than with an unputdownable thriller?  On 9/22/17 Bryan Cassiday’s new thriller Force of Impact is only 99 cents on Kindle.

A private detective hired by a disturbed horror writer to find out what happened to his wife becomes ensnared in a diabolical conspiracy involving a secretive Hollywood club that caters to movers and shakers who prefer to wear masks and remain anonymous.

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The new thriller Force of Impact is now available on Amazon

Bryan Cassiday’s new breakneck thriller Force of Impact is now available for purchase on Kindle.

Hired to find a disturbed horror writer’s missing wife, PI Ethan Carr becomes ensnared in a nightmarish conspiracy involving wealthy members of a secretive Hollywood club, which requires all members to remain anonymous.

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Force of Impact is almost here

In only three more days, Bryan Cassiday’s breakneck thriller Force of Impact will be available on Kindle.  If you can’t wait that long, you can preorder now.

A horror writer’s life spirals into a nightmare when he hires a private detective to investigate his girlfriend’s death in Force of Impact.

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Raw is hard to digest

The French horror film Raw is a well-crafted movie, but I didn’t find it scary.  It made me nauseous in parts, but I never felt scared.  It was interesting to watch, mostly because of the actress Garance Marillier, who is quite intriguing.  She always seems to dominate the screen.  If you’re looking for scares, I wouldn’t suggest this film.  It’s more of a coming-of-age story with disgusting scenes in it.  As such, it is well done.

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American Horror Story: Cult, Episode 1

This season is off to a good start.  Even though the show has politics in it, it’s not about the politics, it’s about the horror.  Political events serve as a backdrop to the horror of a bloodthirsty cult menacing a small town in Michigan and, in particular, a woman, Ally, who lives there with her lesbian lover and their child.  The show’s depiction of a cult evokes the Manson family’s slaughter of Sharon Tate and her friends in a Benedict Canyon mansion at 10050 Cielo Drive, which her husband Roman Polanski was renting from music talent manager Rudolph Altobelli, on a hot August night during the Summer of Love in 1969.

Absurdly and ludicrously, everybody goes crazy in Michigan after Trump beats Hillary in the presidential election, none more so than Ally, the Hillary supporter, and Kai, the Trump supporter.  Ally lives in constant terror and slips in and out of psychosis. Meanwhile, Kai goes bonkers, paints his face with Cheetos, and assembles a cult of murderers, which is when the killer clowns appear and massacre a family, and the horror begins.

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